Preparing for Marriage God's Way

I do not need you. I need Christ, and Him alone. But I do choose you. And because of Him, I have chosen perfectly.

One year ago yesterday, my handsome prince swept me away to Indianapolis. He treated me to my favorite Italian dinner before driving me downtown. We were greeted by my beautiful 5-year-old niece carrying a bouquet of fresh roses that appeared to be twice her size. Fifty red, and one white. She carefully handed the roses to me, and with a big grin declared, “I love you, Auntie.” I turned around to see my Jonathon David lowering to one knee. My heart seemed to stop and yet beat wildly out of control all at once, as he pulled out the single white rose and softly asked me to become his wife. The horse-drawn carriage was waiting as I answered “YES!” How could I promise my forever to anyone other than the one God entrusted with my heart? This was 365 days ago. 

A December 20th wedding date leaves 138 days to go (but who’s counting?!). I imagine the thought running through your head is what a long engagement! Believe me, I know! After nearly four years of dating the man I love, I am too often tempted to wish away a week or two here, or three months there. But it is during those times that I must fix my gaze on the Author of Time, and use this season of waiting to prepare for the great adventure He has written for the future Mrs. Jonathon Wright. 

The National Center for Health Statistics states that 60% of marriages with couples between the ages of 20-25 end in divorce. Because this is not an option for us, Jonathon and I are committed to following these simple “rules” while we wait. Because I am not only a future educator, but also a preacher’s daughter, they are in the form of an acrostic.

Loving God (Learning His true, unconditional love.) One thing I’ve always found amazing about my Jonathon is his ability to love me unselfishly and unconditionally. Loving may come easier for some than others, but if our relationships with Christ are lacking, our relationship with each other will be weak -- now, as well as after our “I do’s.” 

Only Praying for my fiancé on days that end in Y. Last weekend I whispered a prayer that God would give Jonathon the wisdom and peace of mind as he made a difficult decision. (He did.) My desire is to be a wife of consistent prayer for her husband. I believe it is never too early to begin this practice. I would not be Pamela Kuhn’s daughter without mentioning at least one book, and my favorite one on this subject is Praying for Your Husband from Head to Toe by Sharon Jaynes. I have seen God’s powerful answers to prayer in our lives, and I know this is a book I will pull off the shelf to reread countless times through our lifelong marriage. 

Viva laughter! Long live laughter! Jonathon and I make it a practice to enjoy our time together to the fullest. This may seem like a silly idea to mention, but we refuse to let the struggles of life come between God’s gifts of love and laughter. Our relationship was grounded on an incredible friendship, one we wish will only grow and strengthen with each day of our life together. 

Educating ourselves... I do not pretend to know the first thing about marriage. But you better believe I am dedicated to learning every single thing I can about it before my eyes lock with my Jonathon’s at the altar. I have a beautiful example in my parents’ relationship, and they are my number one resource for all things marriage. I also read—a lot—on the subject. My favorite book so far? Well, I am so glad you asked! Gary Chapman’s Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married is a simple, humorous, enlightening read. 

I am obviously no expert on marriage, but I do know I want to be a wife of patience, of encouragement, of unconditional love. I want Christ at the center of our relationship now, so He will be at the center of a marriage which brings all glory to Him.

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