These words have been hanging around in my heart for days. I'm not sure why I had such a dread of putting them out for all to read. I am not an expert on the topic of forgiveness, but I have learned a lot through my own need to forgive, yet even more through those who have extended this beautiful act to me.
There are those who say they forgive. Loud and long they declare it, yet even louder screams their actions, adding a “but” to their declarations.
Standing dwarfed by the unforgivers are the pure, true forgivers. These giants in God’s kingdom are soldiers who have come through the battle of heart pain. They are scarred, yet they carry with them a scent of the beauty of Christ.
I have seen both groups -- the proud, “Look how I forgive,” and the humble, who forgive. And in the forgiving, there mingles love until neither can be separated.
In the midst of the black and white forgiving, one must wonder if in the loud and long there is an unhealthy (both physical and spiritual) unforgiveness.
In the gentlest way possible, may I offer the results of an unforgiving spirit?
An unforgiving spirit...
I do not ask these questions with a prideful and pious spirit. Yet I do
not apologize for reminding you unforgiveness is direct disobedience to God. You can sing and you can dance. You can laugh and you can pray. You can write and even paint. But it is often in the words you choose that unforgiveness shines. The whispered ones, the words with an edge, the belligerent ones, the make-nice ones – even the ones sweetly offered that hold not an ounce of heart connection. It’s in the words you wish you could say, yet allow to fester until they bottle up like fizz and explode in an instant.
I thank God for the forgiving ones. Those who have asked God to forgive them as they forgive others. Those who forgive me not only with open arms, but with open hearts. Those who have been the example to me in this hard place of forgiveness.
I did not want to write this, nor do I know why God wanted me to write it. But I do know that the Holy Spirit is faithful to nudge our hearts with truth, just as our Heavenly Father is faithful to forgive our sins through the death and resurrection of his son, Jesus Christ. What is your heart telling you?
- Influences your children to hold tight to grudges.
- Makes you bitter and sarcastic.
- Keeps the wounds open and infected.
- Imprisons you in the past, when God wants to do something for your future.
- Allows Satan to attack multiple areas of your life.
- Do you look for ways to speak to others unkindly about the individual?
- Do you find a secret joy when you hear others speak evil about them?
- Do you carry on conversations with them in your mind, where you tell them just what you think of them?
- Do you blame your unChristlike attitude towards forgiveness on your personality?
- Do you rejoice when good things happen to them, or does a burning anger reside in your heart?
- Do you find joy in giving them the silent treatment when they are in your presence?
- Do you act like good friends face to face, yet speak evil behind their back?
I do not ask these questions with a prideful and pious spirit. Yet I doI thank God for the forgiving ones. Those who have asked God to forgive them as they forgive others. Those who forgive me not only with open arms, but with open hearts. Those who have been the example to me in this hard place of forgiveness.
I did not want to write this, nor do I know why God wanted me to write it. But I do know that the Holy Spirit is faithful to nudge our hearts with truth, just as our Heavenly Father is faithful to forgive our sins through the death and resurrection of his son, Jesus Christ. What is your heart telling you?
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12 comments:
A very heart-felt post, Pamela. I know when God showed me those two paths - forgiveness vs. unforgiveness. With the help and grace of God I chose to forgive and gave up my rights to unforgiveness! I am so thankful I chose to forgive, ...but the healing seemed to come in increments instead of immediately.
Oh, Pamela,
My heart is so blessed and also challenged. May I be able to give over any hidden unforgiveness to Christ and lay it at the foot of the cross. I am so thankful the Holy Spirit nudges us and guides us to forgive as He first forgave us. May we not quench the Spirit! Thank you for this wonderful; truth so beautifully spoken!
I really like that quote.I had an experience where it was hard for me to forgive someone.
Beautiful!
When you are prompted to write something like this and don't know why I do believe that God has put your words out there for someone that just needs to read it. It may only reach one person-but it is that one person that needs to read it-that will! xo Diana
Aw; good words Pamela! Sometimes forgiving someone who has hurt me or done me wrong seems like the last thing I want to do, but I know unforgiveness is like a cancer that can eat slowly away at me! If I allow myself to dwell on hurtful situations and resentment I allow negative feelings to crowd out positive ones and I might find myself swallowed up by my own bitterness. Once I break the barrier and chose forgiveness, God will set me free from the load I have been carrying, then I can rejoice from the freedom I feel and find peace in my hearts.
Praying this post blessed you as much as it did for me and the many others who have/will read it!
Denise
In transparency -- maybe it was for me?! This past year hasn't been easy, and I'm facing a battle with bitterness. Just this morning I was praying about this very issue determined that by God's grace I WILL forgive. Thank you for your faithful post -- I needed it!
God has used you yet again, dear Pam, and it was not in vain. Sometimes many of us fight this battle, think we have forgiven, than realize that maybe a tiny little sprout has begun to come up again. Thankfully, in our Father's mercy and by His grace, we are able to again forgive - maybe this is part of the 70 times 7?
Blessings!
Hi Pam! I think it's always important to point out what forgiveness looks like, and what it doesn't. Always easier to say than to feel down deep in the heart.
Forgiveness is a very high form of love. It takes grace and it takes practice. And reminding too! So thank you for that today.
Peace,
Ceil
Thank you for this great post... sometimes I need a reminder like this.
Blessings,
Debby
Pamela - I'm glad you are a brave and obedient follower of Christ. Thank you for writing this and being so direct with your words. The part about having imaginary conversations in your head with the person really got me. I've been guilty of that so many times! And it is such a distraction. It is a way of the enemy getting into my heart and head. There is a solution - forgiveness - and I thank you for pointing it out.
As I read this, I was thinking about people who I finally forgave and how it did give me freedom and lightness. But, it also brought up somebody that I do need to forgive and I didn't realize it until reading your words. She is in my daily life and there is no one big thing (unless only circumstantial evidence about money missing from my purse), but just a bunch of other small weird things that drive me nuts. It is like I need to forgive her for being her. I know that sounds awful and obviously I need to work on that, but at least this has given me a direction in which to head. Thanks again, Pamela, for all that you do for us, and for allowing God to work through you.
Hugs,
Kathy M.
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