What I love most about my home is who I share it with. ~Tad Carpenter
The storms Sunday brought me a gift. While grieving with those who lost so much, I have been enjoying some extra moments with my husband. The university building that houses his office is without electricity for the second day. And while still working at home, RB shelters me in the little things of life like fresh tea, a neatly made bed, washing up lunch dishes, sneaking in kisses, and driving me to teach my writing class.
My heart has been mulling over Ann Voskamp's post, The Truth about Boring Men -- and the Women who Live with Them: Redefining Boring. It brought to mind the words of a friend's son: "Mom, the girls here (a university with a Christian world-view) don't care about living in ministry; all they talk about is how big a diamond will be on their engagement ring."
Anne Frank in Anne of Green Gables told Gilbert, "I don't want diamond sunbursts or marble halls. I just want you!" I see so many young people who want only the best as they start their life together. They are more interested in the "diamond sunbursts" and "marble halls." It occupies them more than the importance of relationship building. Which may be why they rush their children from one activity to another, trying to make sure they don't miss out on any worldly pleasure.
In light of Ann's post, we would be called a boring family. We don't need to "have fun" every weekend. We find enjoyment in each other -- whether we're working, reading or conversing. And when we choose to go out, we enjoy that, too. Saturday night the four of us -- Jonathon and Emily, RB and I -- went to Taylor University's production of Shakespeare's Taming of the Shrew. And who would go to Taylor University without having a meal at Ivanhoe's first?
I think we enjoy our time out more because we aren't on entertainment overload. I would gently urge you to raise your family without the constant "go." We linger at the evening meal and shelter each other by listening about each others' days. We discuss deep heart questions and listen to Jonathon and Emily's dreams for their life together. We encourage the ministry they have now, and they listen to our chatter about the projects we are working on. Several years ago Emily saw the conversation cards for table talk advertised and she asked, "Do people really have trouble finding something to talk about?"
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Melanie and Emily were raised on quiet evenings at home. On making music together. On building relationships through conversation -- some deep, others witty, as puns flew across the table. On the importance of ministry-living over self-living. It's a good way to build a family. And I find joy in watching Shawn and Melanie raise their own children with a healthy dose of home.
Shelter your family tonight. Light the candles, pop some popcorn, drag out the goblets and enjoy some sparkling grape juice. Turn off your phones, e-mails and movies. Celebrate with conversation.
Today as RB and I work together in a bustling, noisy Panera, computers back-to-back, sharing food and conversation among working on separate projects, I am content in the midst of our boring. I thrive on it. Boring feeds my soul.
Try it. Try being a little boring. You will find there's joy in the less of life. And deep contentment in "I just want you."
The storms Sunday brought me a gift. While grieving with those who lost so much, I have been enjoying some extra moments with my husband. The university building that houses his office is without electricity for the second day. And while still working at home, RB shelters me in the little things of life like fresh tea, a neatly made bed, washing up lunch dishes, sneaking in kisses, and driving me to teach my writing class.
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| Husband and Wife Photography |
Anne Frank in Anne of Green Gables told Gilbert, "I don't want diamond sunbursts or marble halls. I just want you!" I see so many young people who want only the best as they start their life together. They are more interested in the "diamond sunbursts" and "marble halls." It occupies them more than the importance of relationship building. Which may be why they rush their children from one activity to another, trying to make sure they don't miss out on any worldly pleasure.
In light of Ann's post, we would be called a boring family. We don't need to "have fun" every weekend. We find enjoyment in each other -- whether we're working, reading or conversing. And when we choose to go out, we enjoy that, too. Saturday night the four of us -- Jonathon and Emily, RB and I -- went to Taylor University's production of Shakespeare's Taming of the Shrew. And who would go to Taylor University without having a meal at Ivanhoe's first?
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| Bedford - 1997 |
I think we enjoy our time out more because we aren't on entertainment overload. I would gently urge you to raise your family without the constant "go." We linger at the evening meal and shelter each other by listening about each others' days. We discuss deep heart questions and listen to Jonathon and Emily's dreams for their life together. We encourage the ministry they have now, and they listen to our chatter about the projects we are working on. Several years ago Emily saw the conversation cards for table talk advertised and she asked, "Do people really have trouble finding something to talk about?"
.jpg)
Melanie and Emily were raised on quiet evenings at home. On making music together. On building relationships through conversation -- some deep, others witty, as puns flew across the table. On the importance of ministry-living over self-living. It's a good way to build a family. And I find joy in watching Shawn and Melanie raise their own children with a healthy dose of home.
Shelter your family tonight. Light the candles, pop some popcorn, drag out the goblets and enjoy some sparkling grape juice. Turn off your phones, e-mails and movies. Celebrate with conversation.
Today as RB and I work together in a bustling, noisy Panera, computers back-to-back, sharing food and conversation among working on separate projects, I am content in the midst of our boring. I thrive on it. Boring feeds my soul.
Try it. Try being a little boring. You will find there's joy in the less of life. And deep contentment in "I just want you."
14 comments:
Pamela, this was beautiful.
Yes, unfortunately, we live in a *go* society, and so much is lost. I am also concerned about how the instantaneous ability to connect through social media is actually lessening the intimacy of deeper relationships. I believe it takes a lot of *face time* to really create a relationship that matters.
I have been blessed by a wonderful husband - a husband who has, in fact, spent the last 6 days nursing me through a nasty flu. He is "boring" in all the right ways - steady, reliable, calm, strong.
So grateful.
God finds us in "the less of life" - (loved that phrase!) For He is most often found in the still corners of life, in between the distractions of busyness.
GOD BLESS!
I wholeheartedly agree! My favorite thing in the whole world is just being home with my husband and daughter! I'm glad they feel the same way -- we make LOTS of "boring" memories together!
BBeautiful
Pamela,
Those "boring" family times of calm, commitment, and in-it-for-the-long-haul are what bring true happy families, huh?
Glad your kids get to see that in you two,
Jennifer Dougan
www.jenniferdougan.com
A beautiful post and I do agree!
Gary & I are a little boring, too :)
I'm jealous that you got to go to Ivanhoes! Years ago, when Gary was in the EMC Headquarters, our annual convention was at Taylor. Of course, Ivanhoes was always one of the traditional highlights of the week-end.
Pamela,
I love that last paragraph of yours! It has a giant mouthful of truth!
Blessings!
Esther
P.S. Wish I could sit in on your writing class sometime! I bet you have a lot of tips and wisdom to share.
Very well said, Pamela! Your quiet perspective is like a breath of fresh air... it breathes contentment.
Pamela,
I am blessed and you have hit the nail on the head!! I LOVE my boring man and our 'boring' life :) Haha!!
Praise God for His many benefits to man!
Hugs :)
Hi Pamela! I can just see the two of you at Panera. It's so great that you so enjoy your times together. You are both so blessed. And you children too.
I think society makes us feel that the busier we are the more successful we are. That's not true, is it? We have to be balanced, and do what's best for our family. And that's what you are doing!
Thanks for supporting all of us 'boring' people!
Ceil
Anne Frank, Jewish girl who wrote famous diary and died at Auschwitz.
Anne Shirley, protagonist of LM Montgomery's Anne of Green Gables series.
you say potato, I say tater. boring is subjective and I say contentment is severely underrated. Dave never asked me to marry him; he just said, "it's time to move" and we sold our houses (we lived next door to each other), found this farm and moved.
dozens of years ago, I stopped listening to what "others" said or did; likewise the media. they know nothing about me or my life, therefore aren't qualified to give me advice.
go away. it's far easier to live contented when the voice I listen to is God's and mine own.
Everyone wants everything cheap, right? Obtaining reasonable cheap Business Phone Service is not easy, but if you know how to go about it, then you're going to succeed.
Iam so glad to have found your again . I so agree with you on this post.I have a boring man and love hime for being boring. You are always a beacon of faith on my path. Thanks for being you.
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