Balcony People

Some people are in the "balcony" of your life, cheering you on, energizing you with their affirmation. Others are in your "basement" doing exactly the opposite. ~Joyce Landorf Heatherley


In 1989 Joyce Landorf Heatherley wrote Balcony People.  I was an avid fan of Joyce's writings and this book quickly became a favorite.  I've read hundreds of books since 1989 but this one has stayed with me.


Basement people are those who pull you down or discourage you.  We all have people like this in our lives.  Basement people are all about themselves.  They are negative and critical. They criticize you in order to make themselves feel better. They often presuppose others who “might” think they are a cut above themselves, thus they make no effort to affirm their associates.

Balcony people pull you up and encourage you.  They are quick with affirmations; they cheer you on and are quick with words of encouragement.  They want you to be the best person in Christ that is possible.  They give you confidence to reach your goals.
I have many balcony people in my life.  My family just about fill the balcony section.  My daughters are my biggest fans, rejoicing in my achievements as though they were their own.  But I'm a big girl.  I know who I am in Christ.


Teens, however, need big doses of affirmation.  They need a balcony cheering section that is loud and brave.  Those determined to build them up regardless of who is listening. They need more cheering to counteract the basement people who jealously put them down.  I’m especially grateful for the crowded conditions in Emily’s balcony.

One person in Emily's balcony is Bill -- Mr. Crabtree to her.  Bill is our greeter at church -- the first person you see. Without fail, you find him smiling, joking, but always with the “underneath” feeling of care and love.  Bill not only passes out the encouraging words, but backs them up by being the first to give to mission trips and other school promotions. Countless times, he has told me, “You got yourself a good girl there.” And just recently, another friend shared, “Bill thinks the world of Emily because she has only one mood – cheerful.” I was able to tell Emily, “You may not think anyone notices how hard you try to be like Christ, but some do.” Would Emily strive to be Christ-like without affirmation? Yes, it’s her heart’s desire…But, it’s good for her to hear the words of blessing and appreciation.


How about you?  Do you have balcony people in your life?  Maybe a better question would be Are you a balcony person? Do you exude negativity or positive cheer?  Do you take time to value people?  Are you a dream smasher or are you leaning over the banister rooting for others to achieve their dreams?  Emily Dickinson said, "A word is dead when it is said, some say.  I say it just begins to live that day."  May my words descend from the balcony instead of rising from the cellar.

* * * * *

I met Peter Lord when I was in a writing conference in Titusville, Florida.  He has written numerous books, including Bless and Be Blessed: How your words can make a difference.

"When you bless," says Peter Lord, "dramatic, miraculous changes take place."

With wisdom, personal anecdotes, and hands-on exercises, Lord teaches readers everything they need to know to deliver powerful words with life-changing impact today. He discusses the scriptural basis for blessing others, describes how readers can receive their own blessing from God, and teaches them to weave the practice of blessing into their everyday lives. 


Our May has been quite crazy, leaving little time for "play."  So instead of an idea of my own, I found a few for you to thank the balcony people in your life.  

For women in the balcony:  Heavenly Soap Wrappers: Funky Times

For men in the balcony: Chocolaty Chocolate Chip Cookies: Shoregirl's Creations

For children in the balcony:  Bubble Gum Bouquet: Bentley Boutique   

                                                                    

This  post linked to 

Spiritual Sundays
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Commencement Address

Administrator Clemens, Principal Clemens, faculty, members of the board, fellow classmates, family, honored guests, and commencement speaker, Papaw Sankey:

I have read Charlotte’s messages alongside Wilbur and Fern, was shipwrecked with the Swiss Family Robinson. I have sought refuge in the hiding place with Corrie ten Boom, and witnessed the miracle at camp friendship with Ace and Christi. I have searched for missing gold with Silas Marner. I have asked myself “what would Jesus do” with the First Church of Raymond. 

 But I have also marched around the walls of Jericho. I have sung songs of praise in a prison cell with Paul and Silas. I have attended a wedding and watched Jesus turn water into wine, and have wept when they nailed my Jesus to a tree.

Class of 2011

Words cannot describe my deep appreciation of having the privilege to attend a school which not only taught me the differences between infinitives and gerunds, or how to combine like terms, but also educated me in the fact that God’s Word is the greatest resource that will ever pass through my hands.

Rev. Clemens, you have taught me that a day is not complete without coffee, and that a classroom is for learning, not foolishness. But I have seen Jesus in you. I have sat in this church, service after service as you have helped me to grow in my walk with the Lord.

Mr. Scott, you have trained me how to find the measure of an angle, how to solve for “x” in an equation, and that “water makes you weak.” But you have also shown me that the most important thing in life is serving God. You have taught me to pursue excellence in every situation, and to do hard things when it seems impossible. To not back down from what I know is right, and how to fight for what I know is true.

RB and his girls

Mrs. Coleman, you have taught me not only how a government runs, but also how it should run . From you, I have learned that jolly ranchers can get you just about anywhere, and that when a student is distracted by an object, sometimes you just have to steal it to keep them from sinning. But Mrs. Coleman, you have also warned me that when circumstances come in life that ask me to stray from the Biblical principles, run as far away from those circumstances as distance allows. You have taught me to never be ashamed of what I stand for, and that with God, miracles never cease.

Mrs. Clemens, you taught me long division and how to diagram a sentence. But you also illustrated in your own life that God is worthy of my praise in every situation, good or bad. You have instilled in me through God’s Word to pray for the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart to be acceptable in His sight.

The Cessna Family

Mrs. Turner, you have always helped me in wherever was needed. You have taught me to be flexible, to help in whatever situation needs attention. You have taught me the value of friendship, and of encouraging others.
  

Sra. Crabtree, eres la mujer más paciente que conozco.   And that is all I trust myself to say. I only took two years of Spanish.Publish Post

Papaw and Ganga Sankey

Mom and Dad, you have studied countless hours to help me pass my tests, provided the pencils and life-long supply of erasers, and made me coffee to ensure I would stay awake through yet another five a.m. studying session. But you have also been my spiritual leaders, my prayer warriors, my cheerleaders, my very best friends. Without your daily encouragement, prayers, and your “training me up in the way I should go," I would not be standing here today. The words escape me when I try to explain what you mean to me. I love you.

Classmates: As this chapter in our life is ending; and exciting, yet frightening circumstances await us; Let us never forget the promise in Jeremiah 29:11: For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Our futures are safe in the One who created us. As we place our hands firmly in His, let’s hold our breath and turn the page to discover what He has written for us. He is our all in all, our Rock where we stand, our Vision, and our Plan. What a joy to surrender our lives to Him.

The Kuhn Family

Auntie's favorite little people

Best Friends
Katie flew home from NC to share in Em's special day.

        

This post linked to

Spiritual Sundays
Soli Deo Gloria

Mud Between My Toes

Cheerfulness in most cheerful people, is the rich and satisfying result of strenuous discipline.                                       ~Edwin P. Whipple

Do you ever get tired of doing the same thing over and over?  I write one project, polish it and send it in.  Then I start another.  I never get tired of it.  But cooking? I get tired of a meal before I begin cooking it.  It's over so fast and then it's time to plan another one.  Like laundry -- there's always another load to be done.  

It's part of what I need to do as a (mostly) stay-at-home wife.  RB needs fresh starched and ironed shirts and good meals.  I can gripe, or I can iron and cook cheerfully -- just because I love him. 

The same is true with the things I do for God.  Sometimes the things I do for Him aren't easy.  I'd rather just sit in my chair and write.  But obeying God is my main goal so I say with Paul, "Cheerfully pleasing God is the main thing, and that's what [I] aim to do" (2 Corinthians 5:9).  

And it is the main thing.  I find when I do what He asks my heart fills with joy.  I know when RB sees his starched and ironed shirts he'll be pleased, and in the same way, my cheerful obedience pleases God.  If RB hears me grumble about ironing, it takes pleasure from him.  Grumbling about what I do for God is a sin and takes pleasure from Him. 

Photo by Emily

 We need to teach our children the joy they receive when chores are accomplished cheerfully.  A cheerful child makes parenting easy.  But, more importantly, as they grow they will also cheerfully obey God.  

One way to teach cheerfulness is to hide smiley faces in places your child will find them while doing their chores.  If they have accomplished the chore cheerfully allow him/her to trade the smiley face for a small treat.  

Mud Pie Annie is a spunky little girl with an exceptional talent for cooking with flair. She can make anything from "marvelous eclairs" to "parfait extraordinaire," but not just any ingredient will do. Annie creates her concoctions with mud and dirt—well mixed with pride and care.  She makes them cheerfully, too.  Dear Annie knows the secret.  God doesn't see the mud between her toes -- He sees her cheerful heart.

* * * * *

I love Mud Pie Annie and your children will, too.  Mix up some mud pies (no-bake cookies) or use one of the recipes in the front of the book.  You've probably made them before, but here's a quick recipe:
Bring 2 cups sugar, 2/3 cup milk, 1 stick butter, 1/2 cup cocoa to a boil.  Boil 2 minutes and add 1 tsp vanilla, 1/2 cup peanut butter and 3 cups quick oats.  Drop by spoonful onto waxed paper. 


Another idea is Chocolate Play Dough:

Mud Pie Annie: $3.99

No-Cook Chocolate Play Dough

1 cup of salt

2 cups of plain flour

2 tbsp oil

2 tbsp cream of tartar

1 1/2 cups boiling water
1/2 cup cocoa powder

This was a fun and easy project to put together.  I had a plastic bowl I found at Target 80% off after Valentine's Day.  I made extra large no-bake "mud pies" to fill the bowl.  Tied the book and cookie bowl up in cellophane and tied a big white spoon in the bow.  After all, every "Annie" needs a bowl and spoon to mix up some mud pies.

My Artistic Mother

Beauty does not exist to be ignored, rather it is a reflection of the soul that invites our participation.                           ~Linda Saccoccio 




There are so many things I could say about my mother.  I could tell you about her gentle voice whispering, "Bless your baby heart" when I was sick. (I heard those words during my last illness.)  I could tell you how I loved racing her to the door when Daddy came home to see who got the first kiss.  I could tell you how passionate she was about Christian Education (she always said she'd take me piggyback if she had to). Or how she was always waiting when we came home from school.  I could tell you I never once questioned her relationship with God, because it shined through every part of her life.

Mom and I -- 17 years younger!

But as I was thinking about this post, the thing that kept coming to mind was her love of beauty.  I don't think we ever used anything ugly --  whether it was an ironing board cover or a pencil.  Why use something ugly when you could just as easily use the beautiful.

From my earliest years I realized my mother epitomized a Sheltering Tree -- always creating and giving to others.  But each gift for others, whether a homemade cinnamon roll or a bouquet of flowers, had a beautiful ribbon tied around it.  The quote by Vincent van Gogh -- I feel that there is nothing more truly artistic than to love people -- describes my mother perfectly.

My mother (with Mary Ann Clark) is standing on the left.

Her artistic gene was evident in everything she did, whether sewing dresses for me or making scrapbooks long before it became a fad. Throughout the years my mother tried about every medium available to her.  Classes for oil painting, water colors, drawing, homemade paper, ceramics and china painting -- Mom enjoyed every project, and I quickly learned to admire them all.  None of my friends' mothers appreciated and created beauty with the same intensity as my mother, and I was so proud of her.


I remember a picture Mom colored with me -- a simple picture of a skater.  She colored the girl's outfit red, then shined it with a tissue.  The white fur was finished the same way.  I would love to have that picture, but the one in my mind's eyes is very clear. Mom could transform a coloring book into an artistically flavored coffee table book!

She always supplied me with craft projects, making each trip to the craft store such fun.  We found projects were more fun when we were both enjoying the same one.  We wove baskets together, cross stitched, and experimented with a myriad of creative ideas.

Today she spends her creative time designing beautiful cards like the one she made to congratulate Emily for her regional convention successes.  Just this week my aunt spent time with her to make cards.  She still shelters others and all her thoughtful gifts are still tied with a ribbon.

My mother brought beauty into my life, not only through the artistic gift given by God, but by creative parenting, home decorating and a lifetime of sheltering.  Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not."  My mother found beauty and carries it with her.

Happy Mother's Day, Mom.  I love you.

Women of Influence

Mentoring is relational interaction in which one person empowers another by sharing their God-given wisdom, experience, and habits of obedience to God's word.  ~Rachel Olsen




 Hands down, my mother was -- and is-- the biggest influence on my life.  However, since it's not yet Mother's Day, I want to celebrate some of the other women who have mentored me throughout the years.  In Titus 2:3-5 Paul tells us, These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children,  to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes, to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God. Having a mentor empowered me to be all God planned for us to be. 


At 18 I went from my childhood home to marriage and living on a college campus.  Life changed for me in a hurry.  Those were the days before free cell phone minutes so calling my mother every time I had a question was out.  The wife of the college president, Marlene Beers, became my mentor and continues to this day.  She taught me the practical in the form of recipes and household hints.  She was there when the college quartet sang at a tiny West Virginia camp that provided two dorms: a men's dorm and a women's dorm.  As a new bride I would have preferred to be with my husband but Marlene made it fun.  She was always there to pray with me, share insights into Scriptures and encourage obedience to God even in the small things.

I suggest Transforming Together
by Ele Parrott

And oh, how we laughed.  Marlene has an contageous laugh.  Throughout my seven years of infertility, her exemplary teaching about mothering proved invaluable.  She also taught me how to honor and respect RB, again by example.

From Ohio, we moved to Indiana where another mentor entered my life.  Janet was our senior pastor's wife and soon became a dear friend.  I cannot begin to tell all I learned from her.  We laughed, we cried, and she helped birth my babies.  She also ate pounds of potatoes with me in the weeks after Sarah died. 

Decorating, entertaining and cooking together...walking the track, shopping and road trips were all filled with non-stop talking and a chance for me to learn from someone who walked my path.

There were others throughout the years who touched my life -- Wanda Moser, Grandma Arnold, Granny Golden, Marcile Lane -- all mentored me in some way. 

Being a mentor doesn't require training or perfection.  You don't have to hit the perfect age or have a PhD.  You must, however, love people and have a heart for God.  That's all. 

Follow these Biblical examples to become a mentor:

1.  Be an example.  Hannah has quite a story.  First she endured the "nanny-nanny" of Penniah, her husband's other wife, because of her infertility.  Then she was accused by the Priest of being drunk.  But when God blessed her with a son, she turned around and gave him back to God, keeping the vow she had made to God.  Be free with your story.  If you experienced someone hurting you, share your feelings.  Was it hard for you to see your child leave home to prepare for ministry?  Be honest. Were you accused of something you didn't do? Share the pain.  Authentic mentoring means telling your story.

2.  Share a Bible Study.  Lazarus' sister, Mary, loved learning from Jesus.  My guess is that she shared her new-found knowledge with others.  Help develop Godliness by studying the Bible together.  Show how to apply the Scriptures to everyday life.

3.  Minister together.  Dorcas used her needle to minister to others.  Teach a younger woman a craft such as sewing, knitting or crochet, quilting or flower arranging.  Then use the skill together to minister to others.  Crochet or knit a prayer shawl, arrange flowers for the elderly in care homes.  Make a quilt to give to a homeless shelter or a baby blanket for a pregnancy care center.

4.  Plan times for listening. In the course of grieving for her husband and son, Naomi still had time to listen to Ruth's sadness.  She told her so much about her God that Ruth chose to make Naomi's God, her own God.  Meet at the coffee shop for a latte.  Walk together.  As you listen to the young woman's heart, you will be able to share your God.

5.  Use life-lessons to teach.  Abigail sheltered through hospitality, packing a big picnic lunch for David and his soldiers even though her husband refused to share.  Moses' mother sheltered through mindful parenting, saving him for leadership.  The widow lady who made Elijah a cake sheltered through cooking.

 "A lot of people have gone further than they thought they could because someone else thought they could (unknown).  Ask God to guide you in the area of mentoring.  Keep your heart tender and open.  Mentoring is  a Biblical command -- a beautiful way to shelter.

* * * * *

Has there been someone who has mentored you?  Why not give them a small gift this Mother's Day?  Here's an easy gift idea -- I haven't found anyone yet who didn't like this mix.



5 c. Rice or Corn Chex
3 c. Cheerios
2 c. stick pretzels
2 c. pecan halves

2 c. marshmallows

12 oz. chocolate chips

1 lb. white chocolate

  

Stir first six ingredients together, melt white chocolate and pour over dry ingredients. Stir to coat. Pour out on wax paper to dry.

I made the cone from one 12" x 12" piece of scrapbook paper, rolled into a cone and glued.  After I filled it with the mix I covered it with cellophane and tied a bow around it. 

For another idea to fill your cone check out Homespun With Love.  Kristin punched holes on the side and made a ribbon handle.  Livy from A Field Journal made these musical cones.  Wouldn't they be perfect for a music recital?  Here's an idea from Save-On-Crafts, and I can't wait to try these smaller ones from Split Coast Stampers.  Family Crafts has an idea a child can make -- check out the flowers they fill them with.  My kind of flowers! 

I'm sure you can come up with others throughout web-land.  If you have other ideas of what to fill the cones with I'd love for you to share them.  I'm getting addicted to this packaging!

Linking to

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Fantabulous Friday at Mom's Kinda Crafty

Just Something I Whipped up at The Girl Creative



Alive and Well!

Church isn't where you meet.  Church isn't a bulding.  Church is what you do.  Church is who you are.  Church is the human outworking of the person of Jesus Christ.  Let's not go to church, let's be the church.                                                                        ~Bridget Willard





This was the first time I was in the hospital since my Emily was born -- 18 years ago.  I had great nurses, techs and nutritionists, but it was, well...a hospital. I was happy to be released.  Hurrying home I packed my suitcases and we left for our conference.  I got to watch the services through live streaming in my hotel room, giving me time to rest and heal.  So to all you faithful readers who have been concerned, I am alive and well!

I chose to go to the last service because it's one of my favorites of the conference.  Five Bible College choirs and orchestras join together as a mass choir.  The director this year was a man who sang in RB's choir years ago.  We always love it when Jerry directs.

I hope you'll listen to their last song (linked here).  We hear so much about the failures of the church.  The church is either too conservative or too worldly.  Too many uncaring members.  Too many hypocrites.  Too boring.  Too many rules.  Too sick to do much good.

I disagree.  Oh yes, I do agree that you could find these "failures" and many other faults among the pews and even pulpits of the church.  I, too, get weary of the focus on rules without attention to integrity and character.  To the profession of love when the focus is funds.  But God's church?  His church goes beyond attendance numbers, the songs we do or do not sing, and the size of the church campus.  God's church is full of His presence.  His people, human yet forgiven, are living authentic lives, full of love for their Creator and Savior and each other.

I believe a healthy church uses the media of our day to reach all ages and diversities of its members.  They can sing with reverence Robert Grant's "Oh, worship the king..." written in the 1800s  and with the same heart of praise Jack Hayford's, "Majesty, worship His Majesty..."  written in 1997. A healthy church uses websites, Youtube videos and blogs to reach others with the same passion the early church used their sandals to walk from town to town preaching about Jesus. 


  The Church Awakening 

 A healthy church will use all menus available to enable God's children to grow in their faith and walk with God.  Bible studies, new believer classes, revivals, and Bible-based preaching.  Our pastor uses God's Word throughout his messages and I love finding the passages in my Bible, seeing the correlation between the Old and New Testament, prophecy from Isaiah fulfilled in Luke, etc.  A healthy church will be passionate for Christ, and that begins in the love of God and His Word.

This church isn't just my church or your church.  It's not limited to those in the United States.  It's not even confined to those meeting in Gothic cathedrals or small country churches.  It's not restricted to your denomination or mine.  God's church -- those who "believe on the Lord Jesus Christ" come from all walks of life.  They may dress like you or they may not.  Their preferences in music may match yours and they may not.  God may have found them in the university or in jail.  They could be a sports hero or a homeless person. If God has accepted them into His church, who are we to criticize? Ultimately, if we do, we are criticizing and questioning the God we profess is living in our hearts and leading our lives.

The young people singing in the mass choir comes from various parts of the United States and other countries.  Yet they are passionate about the church of God -- the Triumphant Church.  Oh yes, many have tried to destroy it throughout the years. The Pharisees with their rules and rituals tried to destroy it -- even killing the Cornerstone of the church.  In the 1500s Bloody Mary tried to stamp it out by burning 300 Christians at the stake.   Today although our methods have changed, Satan uses us, whether with an everything goes embracement or nit-picking exclusion, to kill the church -- but it stands today.  Yes, God's church stands triumphant -- it is alive and well! 

Linked to:

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Guest Post: Jamie Isaacs

My friend's daughter, Jamie, wrote this article and I wanted my readers to have a chance to read -- and learn -- from it.

I took Ethan to the pet store to see the baby ducks and chicks. They were in two huge storage containers -- chicks in one and ducks in the other.

 

The bright yellow ducks were so adorable and sweet looking! They just waddled around in a tight little bunch and chirped at their visitors. The chicks, on the other hand -- what a difference!  I thought something was wrong because the blood was running down one poor little chick's tail feathers, coloring his white feather crimson. I watched in horror as the other chicks pecked repeatedly at the hurt bleeding chick; they were all chirping, but the hurt chick chirped really loud with pain every time his brothers and sister would peck his wounds. I couldn't bear to watch too much, so I found the sales clerk, and reported the incident!  She told me that they pick on the bigger chicks and they have to separate the hurt chicks from the rest of the brood until their wounds heal.  She never rescued the wounded chick while I was there. I couldn't take hearing and seeing that poor little chick get pecked on by his brothers and sister -- so we left the store.

 

Later the thought came to me how much we, as Christians, are like those little chicks. We see somebody who is prettier, smarter, skinnier, has more money, has everything we want in life and we feel like life is not fair. So to compensate for our own lack of "whatever," we put them down, say hurtful things or, in chicken terms, we "peck" at them, trying to make ourselves feel better. Here is a real life example for you:

 

Jadyn looked beautiful today -- hair curled, fancy Easter dress, beautiful shoes with some rhinestones and (barely) heels; plus, she is beautiful on the inside where it matters most, but another little girl told her, "Your face is ugly!"   It hurt Jadyn's heart. I tried to explain to her, "That girl LOVES to have fancy dresses and look like a princess; she was jealous of you because you looked so beautiful, and she didn't have a beautiful princess dress nor her hair curled."

 

Sometimes, we will see our brothers or sisters in Christ going through one of the hardest times of their life. Instead of loving and praying for them, we point fingers, call names, or get angry at them for letting us down. We "peck" their open wounds with judgmental words. They need us to pray, and to love them while they are broken and bleeding.  Instead, many times we fail.  In a spiritual sense we "peck our brother and sister to death."

 

I guess as I sit here sleepless tonight my prayer is, "God, it's not for me to understand the actions of others; I didn't give my life for them -- Jesus did.  If Jesus with His wisdom and mercy forgives or  picks up one who is hurting, who am I to gossip, judge, or feel bitterness? Help me to have a burden for those that are hurting, those that have fallen, not 'peck them to death,' but to help 'pick them back up.'  Amen."

I am sure you all hope we don't get pigs anytime soon -- I might start getting Life Lessons from the Hogs!

 

 

 

I need Thee, O Lord, for a curb on my tongue; when I am tempted to making carping criticisms and cruel judgements, keep me from speaking barbed words that hurt, and in which I find perverted satisfaction. Keep me from unkind words and from unkind silences. Restrain my judgements. Make my criticisms kind, generous, and constructive. Make me sweet inside, that I may be gentle with other people, gentle in the things I say, kind in what I do. Create in me that warmth of mercy that shall enable others to find Thy strength for their weakness, Thy peace for their strife, Thy joy for their sorrow, Thy love for their hatred, Thy compassion for their weakness. In thine own strong name, I pray. Amen.    ~Peter Marshall

 

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